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Every week in this space, we’ll take a look at the news and offer our own incisive blend of commentary, analysis, and poop jokes. The news you need, from a voice you can trust, in the 90 seconds you have to spare: that’s Woot Weads the Wire. A North Carolina judge says a woman convicted of resisting a public officer and being intoxicated and disruptive m...

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True fitness isn’t just about the body. It’s about the mind. That’s why we’re gonna motivate you, right now. Did you know that some sports can save… the world? It’s true! Throughout history, man has told stories (both real and imaginary) that center around the magic of sports. We’ll start at the beginning, shall we? Her...

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There were four of us down there for the first thirty-two months and eleven days of our captivity. And then, very suddenly and without warning, there were three. Even though the fourth person hadn’t made any noise at all in several months, the room got very quiet when she was gone. For a long time after that, we sat in silence, in the dark, each of us wondering what this meant for her and for us, and which of us would be the next in the box.
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